The justification for this rule was two-fold: 1) Technically, children are given the religion of their father, and so legally speaking, the offspring of a union between a Muslim male and a kitabiyya would still be Muslim; 2)It was argued that Muslim men are Islamically prohibited from forcing their wives to become Muslim. However, in Christianity and Judaism a similar prohibition against coercion does not exist.
According to their own religious law, Muslim jurists argued, Christian men may force their Muslim wives to convert to their (the husbands') religion.
I think, and God knows best, that this position is not reasonable and the evidence supporting it is not very strong.
However, I must confess that in my humble opinion, I strongly sympathize with the jurists that argued that in non-Muslim countries it is reprehensible (makruh) for a Muslim to marry a non-Muslim. it is best for the children if they grow up with a Muslim father and mother.
After telling her all of this, I add that she must always remember that only God knows best; that she should reflect on the matter as hard as she can; then she should pray and plead for guidance from God; and then ultimately she must do what her conscience dictates. I pray to God to guide us both to what He pleases and wants, and that He helps the sister you wrote me about to find peace and tranquility with whatever decision she makes.
This is airing dirty laundry but so be it, this is our harsh reality.[Name withheld for privacy]****************************************Al-salamu 'alaykum sister: First I should apologize for the long time it has taken me to respond to your message. But on a happier note, recently we were blessed with a wonderful baby boy.
Really in actuality from what I've seen this is not the case.
The woman has so much pressure put on her to abandon her beliefs that she eventually gives in or gets out of the marriage.
They argued that in non-Muslim countries, mothers will be able to influence the children the most.
Therefore, there is a high likelihood that the children will not grow up to be good Muslims unless both parents are Muslim.
Some jurists even went as far as saying that Muslim men are prohibited from marrying a kitabiyya if they live in non-Muslim countries.